Originally published in the winter 2026 edition of Aging & Independence
By Allison Boyer
Interim Director, Aging & Independence Services, San Diego County
For over 30 years, Sylvia has been living in her family’s San Diego mobile home. Her mother purchased it, and they lived together happily, sharing many good times in the home. With two retirement pensions to pay the bills, Sylvia and her mom were able to live comfortably. Sadly, Sylvia’s mother passed away in 2014. Sylvia suddenly had the pressure of maintaining a household on only half the income.
Fortunately, Sylvia is not one to back away from a challenge. She has overcome several personal challenges, such as learning to effectively manage chronic health conditions. She also has navigated a successful career, serving for more than 20 years as a supervisor for the US Post Office. From these experiences she has learned how to solve problems, look for people to collaborate with, and make things happen.
Not wanting to move from her beloved home, Sylvia decided to look for a couple of roommates to invite into her household. She learned about ElderHelp’s HomeShare program, a unique affordable housing solution that matches seniors who want to age in place with adults seeking lower-cost housing.
The benefits to homeowners (or renters with a spare room) are many: supplemental income, peace of mind with having another person in the home, and companionship. The service exchange option allows a home seeker to provide some assistance around the house (e.g., housekeeping, errands, transportation) in exchange for reduced rent on a room. ElderHelp assists in matching potential housemates, conducting background checks and other types of screening, creating a rental agreement, and mediating any difficulties that may arise.
Overall, Sylvia has had positive experiences renting out the two extra rooms in her home. She shares, “I’m a good judge of people,” but admits that one of the things she likes best about HomeShare is that they do a background check. She also notes that in the HomeShare program, the first month allows for a trial period for both parties to adjust to the new living arrangements and work out the kinks—or not. The program helps participants complete a match agreement, sets clear expectations, and supports both participants throughout the match, including when it ends. Many people have achieved long-lasting and meaningful connections through the program. The average match lasts four years with the longest match reaching over 17 years.
Sylvia has had several roommates over the past ten years. Sylvia describes her current roommate “as a gift from God.” She brings a kind and gentle energy into the home. She also cooks soft food that Sylvia can eat with ease despite using dentures. Even though the two having been living together happily for the past couple of years, Sylvia admits the pair had to adjust a little bit as they “are opposites.” Sylvia explains, “I talk too much! I have to try to be quiet and keep my music reasonable.”
Sometimes life with roommates has brought challenges. A couple of years ago, one of Sylvia’s roommates started experiencing health challenges. “I really liked her,” Sylvia recalls, “but I couldn’t live with her [anymore].” Sylvia expressed gratitude for the guidance and support provided by ElderHelp in helping her roommate find a level of care that best met her needs. This support allowed the match to end on a positive note and gave Sylvia the opportunity to find a new match moving forward.
Having others in the home helps Sylvia to feels safe and more at ease. Sylvia has some health concerns which cause her to have balance problems. As she is prone to falls, Sylvia appreciates the help roommates can provide with certain in-home tasks, such as answering the front door and providing assistance when her balance is off. It has been a blessing for Sylvia to be able to live independently but have the peace of mind of knowing someone else is in the home.
Most of all, having roommates has been a boon for Sylvia’s social life. With an outgoing personality, she enjoys the company of the people who cross her path. Sylvia shares, “I have 150 friends and I’m adding every day!” Saying goodbye has been the hardest part of sharing her home. Sylvia muses, “Roommates come and they go, but I get attached to people so when they leave, it hurts.”
Often though, goodbyes can lead to new beginnings. After more than 30 years in her beloved home, Sylvia is now the one packing her bags and preparing to embark on a new adventure—and this time she’ll be the roommate. Sylvia is planning a move to Houston to live with a family member. As she gets older, she is looking forward to receiving extra support and companionship from family. But while Sylvia is excited about the next phase, she is taking her time. She won’t be leaving until her current roommate finds a new place to land. Sylvia is hopeful HomeShare will help her current roommate find just the right match, as the program did for her throughout the last ten years.
ElderHelp is grateful to partner with the County of San Diego to provide the HomeShare program. For more information on HomeShare, please visit: https://elderhelpofsandiego.org/solutions-for-living/homeshare/ or call (619) 284-9281.
